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Monday, October 4, 2010

The return to the Fright Night Scream Park

Remember how I had mentioned all the strange phone calls I had been receiving for the past week or so on the Weird Fresno hotline? A woman kept calling me and leaving cryptic messages about how she needed my help, but wouldn’t say what she needed exactly. Curiosity got the best of me and I finally called her back. Little did I know what a huge mistake I was making.

The woman had said she needed help with a haunting and that she wanted to meet me in Clovis. She gave me an address that was at the intersection of Shaw and Clovis Avenues. It should have rung a bell with me, but I blame the lack of sleep (created by 2:00 am phone calls from said woman) for me not picking up on things sooner. When I got there I realized the error in judgement I had made. I was at the Fright Night Scream Park.

A place I had promised myself that I would never visit again.

I was already there, so I grabbed my camera that I always keep in my car and walked towards the entrance. I was hoping this was still someone who needed my help, but at this point my gut feeling was that it was a trap. As I approached the front doors, they opened and out walked a pretty young, pale woman. She said she and the other “residents” were expecting me and was glad their little trick worked. At this point I knew I was screwed.

She beckoned for me to follow her in and she wanted to show me the upgrades they had made to the locale, stating that she was for sure certain that I would meet my demise there and join their ranks as one of the undead. Boy do I know how to piss someone off or what?

The first attraction we went to was Psychosis 3D. I figured if I could get through the creepy clowns right away then I’d be able to handle anything. You think I would have learned by now, but no. The clowns were way worse than last year, and of course they remembered me (Rule #31: never piss off a clown). I was able to shoot a bit of video; I apologize for the shaky footage as I was running for my life.

After that little sunshine filled trip to the crazy farm, my guide grabbed me and dragged me to the Necropolis. She told me it had been “revamped” and laughed. To me this pretty much meant I was screwed. Even worse was that this was where my guide “lived” and said she wanted me to join her there. I’ll be honest and was tempted as like I said she was pretty cute, but I avoided temptation and declined her offer. Which was probably a good thing.

After that little excursion through hell we went to what was now called Quarantine. Last year it had been called Desecration, but apparently some sort of virus outbreak had occurred and now they were all zombie cannibals. Oh good, I thought, cause regular cannibals aren’t bad enough. What I find humorous about this was the glee my guide had for trying to have me meet my demise. You’d think I’d somehow wronged her. But no, she just didn’t like me. This bit of video I shot proves that.

We finally got out of there and the Asylum was last on her list of places to kill me. And unlike my guide from last year, she went in there with me (I liked her, she had gumption). Yeah this was even more bat shit crazy than last year. I don’t want to give anything away, but whoever decorated that place has some serious issues. A little Prozac might help, just a suggestion is all. I was able to get some footage of the attraction, but the “guests” there weren’t too happy about this.

As I left the Asylum I head something that terrified me . Somehow the Fresno Beehive has teamed up with the Fright Night Scream Park to do a tweet up (or screamup as they called it). The event is on October 21, at 7:00 pm and ticket prices are half off what they normally are. But you have to RSVP to @FresnoBeehive to be on the list and follow @FrightNightSP (even the undead are on Twitter it seems). For more info I’m linking the page to the Beehive’s blog. Apparently there’s a pre-tweetup going on at Rio Grill in Sierra Vista Mall starting at 5:30. Most likely I will go as I want to see what the hell is going on. Well that and I want to see if the offer to join my now former guide there as a resident is still good or not. Hey, I can’t help it. As I said, she was cute and spoke with an accent.

And somehow I was able to make it through all four attractions yet again. I’d like to say it was because of my guile, wit, and charm. But we all know it was due to sheer luck. As I was walking out of the attraction (ok running like a scared little girl) I saw a familiar looking gentleman.

As an old school Michael Jackson fan I was glad to see him working again. Mr. Jackson was generous enough to give me several free one attraction passes to the Fright Night Scream Park (I don’t think this are good for the screamup as that’s a different event). I’ll be posting something mid week regarding giving away the passes. So stay tuned.

1 comment:

Heather said...

Great post, sir.

FYI: The pre-party for the Fresno Beehive Screamup starts at Rio Grill at 5 (there will be free appetizers from 5 to 5:30).